The Haunting Question

"They found my mother the next day, hiding in the nearby forest. They say she was talking to herself when they found her. The villagers took her to the police along with my newborn sister. For the...

Published02 October 2015

Reading Time 2 mins

Author Stories of Nepal

Location Nepal

"They found my mother the next day, hiding in the nearby forest. They say she was talking to herself when they found her. The villagers took her to the police along with my newborn sister. For the next ten years, I didn't see them. I grew up with a lot of resentments against her. For what happened and what could've been. Someone told me that she was at the Central Jail so one day I decided to go meet her. From outside the prison bars, I saw her. It didn't feel like I was meeting my mother. The love was not there. It was just indifference. I returned without anything that could fill the hole in my heart. After sometime, I found out that she has been released from prison and was staying at an orphanage with my sister. I went to see her again. As we exchanged small talk, I blurted out the question that had been haunting me all my life, 'Why mother? Why did you do it? Why did you kill my father?'. She looked away and plainly said, 'I don't know'. And like a mad person kept repeating it, 'I don't know...I don't know...I don't know'. Then all those whispers about my mother flashed back and finally it sunk, that she had in fact lost her sanity a long time ago. Finally, I got my answer to why she threw ashes on me that day when I asked for food, and why she killed my father." (Sujan Tamang, Batase, Sindhupalchowk. Met him in Thamel, Kathmandu) (2/3)

Join the Archival Journey

Receive weekly dispatches from the field—stories of resilience, tradition, and the changing landscape of Nepal delivered quietly to your inbox.