Leela R Mahottari
“The days of the past are long gone. The ways of the past are long gone. Punishments that we would receive daily are now not acceptable. So we have to change our ways. When I was growing, I did not know what love was. Yes, my parents did feed me and there was an occasional hugging but other than that I was left alone. My parents did not know better nor did they have the time and the privilege to spend extra time with me. I understand. Everything was for survival and bonding time was out of the question. It was not a concept they understood. The fathers were absent from raising their kids. They still are. You walk around the village and you will find children clinging to either their mothers or their grandparents. The father is mostly away. Sometimes, the father doesn’t even pick up the child. I am not saying everyone is like that but a lot of fathers do not understand that raising a child is a shared responsibility and that it is as much a man’s job that it is a woman’s. I am glad my husband understands the importance of the role of a father that is why he is actively participating in raising our grandchildren. The son goes to work but my husband always requests him to spend time with the kid. He says, “Look, we left you to your own devices, but don’t repeat the mistakes we did. Spend time with your boy. He will see how you will change his future for good.”
All of this knowledge we acquired from the parenting sessions. It has not only changed the behaviours of children but also adults. My heart is at peace these days and it has also taught me to get along with the other members of the family. Sometimes, I keep calm in order to maintain a good environment for the children at home. But it wasn’t always the case. I never realized the ruckus amongst us would disturb the children mentally. You see they are like soft clay. Today, I am happy that I can enjoy time with my husband and with my grandchildren. I am old and my day will come but they are teaching me so much. I have learnt to be patient and tolerant. I have learnt how to love. But most importantly, I have learnt that no age is too old to learn new things. No age is too old to correct past mistakes.”
(Leela R, Mahottari)
