Didi Kathmandu
“People have the right to part ways if they differ in their thoughts. My parents separated too. My father did not trust my mother so they found no grounds for a relationship. I witnessed the fallout which made me feel like I was the victim. I was rigorously trying to escape the situation. This incident in my life made me a quiet person. During that time, I felt that I was not strong enough to be vocal or to resolve the situation. I also kept quiet because I did not want to be the reason for any confrontation. I was scared of conflict. There were times when I had aggressively countered my father and defended my mother. But it had filled me up with guilt. So I had decided to remain quiet. I was always lost in my own thoughts, accustomed to my own fears, and guilt. I was talking to myself and, not with the people around me.
If the relationship between my parents was normal, I imagine myself having a better life. Good schooling, guidance for education, and career. I would have felt more secure financially and emotionally. I would have felt more confident to take on challenges for my future.
But, at the same time, I am not dissatisfied or complaining about what I have today and what I have become. This experience in life has also made me resilient. I have learned of heartbreaks and I learned of life and relationship. As of late, I have started to look beyond myself. I realise that my siblings might also have been struggling which I might have been ignoring for a long time. I realise that then I was naive not to see what my mother was going through. Everything that has happened has also made me very independent and sensitive toward human emotions, I try to understand people more thoroughly than making a quick judgment. Today, I have acceptance. Today, I have empathy. For everyone. Even for my father.”